5 Confirmed aliases
1 Genre: 'Hobbitgrass'
20+ Flock cameras. Since.
RECOVERED PROMOTIONAL MATERIAL
Exhibit 045: The Poster
On June 3rd at 9 P.M., at a venue called Balcony Backstage, the subject took a stage under the alias 'TITO BANDITO' with an organization styling itself THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE STRINGS. The promotional one-sheet — recovered in full color — depicts a dark tower flying the Colorado state flag, five superimposed faces, and more stringed instruments than any reasonable errand requires.
The band's self-declared genre is 'Hobbitgrass.' The Committee ran the term through three databases and one very patient librarian. It is not code for anything. It is worse: it is sincere. The lineup row has been sealed by order of the Committee. They know who they are — and more importantly, Tyler knows who they are.
Aliases on one poster 5
The Characters
Five aliases confirmed. Real identities sealed pending consent, snacks, or both. Descriptions, regrettably, accurate.
TITO BANDITO
Positively identified as the subject. The alias fooled no one — he was holding a banjo, and the beard is unmistakable. Currently does your marketing.
BIRDMAN
String operations. Distinguishing feature: answers to 'Birdman.' The Committee's sketch artist submitted a drawing of a bird. He has been reassigned.
STEEZY
Alias reportedly derived from 'style' plus 'ease.' Investigators confirmed the name is earned, which is somehow more concerning than if it were not.
CISLE
Pronunciation unresolved after four hearings. Sources place him in at least one additional Durango string organization. The scene, as we feared, is a web.
RUCKUS
Named, as far as the Committee can determine, after the thing that neighbors report. Considered rowdy and extremely pleasant.
[NAME SEALED]
This tile is reserved for the associate our lawyers are most excited about. Check back after the depositions, or after brunch — whichever concludes first.
WARDROBE ANALYSIS
Exhibit 026, Re-Entered Into the Record
When your associates are named Birdman and Steezy, you do not get to dress like this and call it blending in. The subject was most recently photographed performing in a full white satin suit — wearing, and forensic stylists confirmed this twice, a bow tie AND a necktie at the same time.
The suit reflects stage light. The banjo is propped on a red keyboard, which the Committee now considers his signature move. Our official position is that a man who owns this outfit is capable of anything, including an encore.
Neckwear count 2
RELATED ORGANIZATION
The Party Mountain Question
Public records place a 'Tyler Rice, banjo' inside an outfit called the PARTY MOUNTAIN STRING BAND — an organization that has, per sources, been operating for approximately twelve years. Twelve years. Of party. On a mountain. With strings. The Committee asked whether this is the same Tyler Rice. The answer was a banjo solo.
The surveillance photograph shows a gathering at an undisclosed mountain campground: seventeen individuals, one upright bass, one mandolin, at least one blue wig, and a shirt that simply says 'HUMP.' Investigators embedded at the scene report the party was, quote, 'excellent,' and have not returned.
Years of party 12
Case Note 005-C: The Flock Correlation
Over twenty Flock cameras now watch Durango — installed only AFTER years of association with characters like these. You be the judge.
20+
Flock cameras now watching Durango
2
Characters named 'Steezy' and 'Birdman'
0
Established connections between these facts
100%
Rate at which the cameras declined to comment
FIELD EVIDENCE
New Material, Entered Into the Record
EXHIBIT 046 — The subject mid-'Hobbitgrass,' singing at a volume experts classify as 'from the diaphragm.' Photographer credit preserved.
EXHIBIT 047 — The organization under a dome. Note the jar labeled 'TIPs.' Surveillance was compromised when a civilian entered the frame.
EXHIBIT 045 (ARCHIVAL) — The poster, in black and white for seriousness. The tower is a copyright-adjacent homage. The flag is load-bearing.
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QUESTIONS THE COMMITTEE PRETENDS TO GET
Alias FAQ
Are the aliases real?
Painfully. Every name in this file appears verbatim on promotional material the organization printed about itself. The Committee could not improve on it and did not try.
Is 'Hobbitgrass' dangerous?
Only to genre taxonomy. Documented symptoms include second breakfast, unsolicited Tolkien lore, and a five-string banjo played with total conviction.
Did the aliases fool anyone?
A man performed as 'Tito Bandito' in a shiny white suit while being the most photographed banjoist in La Plata County. You tell us.
What about the Flock cameras?
The Committee reiterates: over twenty automated cameras now watch Durango, and Tyler knows a man named Steezy. We have presented these facts to every authority available, including a golden retriever, who agreed it was 'a lot.'
Is Party Mountain a real place?
It is an organization, a lifestyle, and per one witness 'more of a vibe.' Twelve years of operation. No known address. The mountain, presumably, knows.