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#ReleaseTheBanjoReceipts

DISCLOSURE CAMPAIGN, ACTIVE — STOP TYLER demands complete disclosure of Tyler Rice's banjo-related expenditures. He has promised nothing. We are counting anyway.

View the recovered ledger
0 Days since he promised
1 Receipts released
REDACTED Total expenditure

The Countdown Nobody Can Explain

Live figures from the Committee's disclosure-tracking division.

0

Days since Tyler promised to release the receipts

1

Receipts fully released

5

Strings per undisclosed banjo

REDACTED

Total banjo expenditure

The Recovered Ledger Fragment

Obtained by Committee investigators from a source we can only describe as 'the trash, probably.' Presented exactly as found.

FISCAL YEARS 2013–2018 — PURCHASE RECORDS (PARTIAL)

  • ███████ 5-String Banjo
    Vendor: redacted. Amount: redacted. Strings: five. They couldn't redact the strings. We counted them in the photos.
  • ███████ Banjo Head
    Replacement head, suggesting sustained percussion-adjacent strumming. The mason-jar drum head in Exhibit 005 remains unexplained.
  • ███████ Strings (Recurring)
    A subscription. To banjo strings. The playing was INDEFINITE by design.
  • $8.43 — Coffee
    The only unredacted line item in the entire document. A medium drip with an add shot. We have verified this purchase seventeen times. It checks out. It's the only thing that checks out.
  • █████████ Definitely Not Another Banjo
    The line item literally says this. We are not making this up. We are making everything else up, but not this. (We are also making this up. It's a satire site. But SPIRITUALLY it's real.)

TOTAL

  • TOTAL: REDACTED
    The Committee's forensic accountants attempted to compute the total from string-gauge purchase intervals. The resulting figure was 'a banjo number.' The methodology has been sealed.

APPENDIX C — TRAVEL EXPENSES

Ground Transportation: $0.00

Investigators obtained this photograph of Rice's historical ground-transportation strategy: standing on a highway shoulder holding a cardboard sign reading '191-N', banjo case at his feet, thumb deployed.

Total documented travel spending for the period: zero dollars. The Committee cannot explain how this man now operates a technology company. We suspect the banjo case contained the technology. It contained a banjo.

Ground Transportation: $0.00

Where are the banjo receipts, Tyler?

Sign the petition. Share the hashtag. Check your own trash for ledger fragments. The people deserve an itemized answer.

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